Moving On Up...In Business and In Life - Part 1: Let the Numbers Do the Talking!

In the past 30 years of research into how we move ahead into anything greater both in business and in life, I’ve found some very common patterns in the stumbling blocks that prevent us from moving from here – to there.

Rather than just taking the positive side of what’s needed to accomplish this step, I have a slightly different approach. This includes what we need to do to move ahead, but it also gives equal recognition to the areas that seem to hold us back, as well. Instead of taking up arms on only what works, that good advice would still be leaving out half of the complete picture.

So, after writing nearly 2000 pages on self-help, positive relationships and business in the past 15 years, even at the end of all of this exploration, in the “real-world” where we are, we still come right up to the line that we all desire to cross. Everyone, no matter how successful or happy, still have mountains they wish to climb, that are just up ahead of where they are now. And, the more success you’ve had, the more likely you’ll feel confident about your next adventure! But, how can we make the move in our minds and out in the world, when we still have some lingering doubts?

For me, I examine two things to help with the remainder of what’s there. The first is to be honest about exactly where I desire to be, and the things that I feel are in my way towards reaching that goal. And, the “things” I feel are in my way, have two separate components…

As far as seeing into the future of what I want, there’s always going to be a little bit of it that's not visible, because – I’m not there yet! So, to deal with those feelings, I have to do my best to look at and work with what’s here. Meaning, even though I have a few doubts about the future, if I look a little closer at where I am, there will be a few things that are known and visible for me to work with, so that I can get closer to where I would like to be.

Those doubts aren’t just about reaching the destination successfully. My doubts and my confidence also include a few things that I can work on – right where I am. In other words, in one way or another – until I’ve actually arrived, there will still be a little uncertainty left over. Unless it’s a move in an area that we’re already familiar with, of course, there will be some doubts left about our final outcome. Even with the success I feel I’ve had (and I still have a lifetime left to go), it’s very rare that anyone has 100% confidence in a move they’re about to make; especially if it’s a new one...

The best we can (realistically) count on is to feel as good as possible about the choice we’re about to make. Sometimes we know 100% that the step is a positive one, but we’re not 100% sure about getting ourselves there. So, that’s where the doubt comes in. Not about the choice itself – but if we can take the steps that are needed to move ourselves into place.

Other times, we might have mixed feelings about both parts...So, what can we do?

Instead of trying to ignore how we feel on the left hand, while paying attention to grow how we feel on the right, try this approach...

If we give ourselves a little time to take an honest look at our greatest desire and our worries about it, we’ll see that we’re already a lot closer to taking the step than we think. Rather than trying to ignore the negatives, when we give each side of the equation its rightful due, we’ll find there’s often a path that runs between these two options, where we can make our next move that much easier.

The more you look at something from a neutral standpoint without trying to overcome anything or to just look on the bright side, you’ll naturally decrease the tension found here about your success. Here, a little window of opportunity opens up. If we know the choice is a good one and we would really like to take it, we’ll be able to see even further up the road into where this will take us. From there, we gain more energy and inspiration to take a step where we are now, with what’s known.

When we see more possibilities in what we wanted to do, our attitude and our actions from here, will not only take us closer to where we want to be, but the steps we take now, will also be removing any lingering doubts, as well.

As far as taking the last step, when we give a voice to both sides of how we feel about something (especially if we’re hoping to land safely and happily on the other side), we’ll feel much more confident about taking the last step. I know that thinking, feeling and being positive is what all of us really “want” to help lead us forward. But, we all have doubts sometimes; even about something good – no matter how successful or skilled we are. It's in the recognition of this, where we give ourselves the space to relax even more into making our next step possible. Even the best ideas are not 100% guaranteed – but we can get ourselves very, very close to feeling that way about them. Sometimes, only 51% of positivity, will take us over the line to where we are ready now to take our next step forward.

So, rather than waiting for the conditions or our emotions to be 100% before we move, we can still be confident knowing it’s the right move because we’ve given both sides a voice; and it’s still – where we would like to be!

If you’ve got an idea you’re on the fence about in business or in life, give both sides a voice on paper, and see what you come up with. Doing this will make you feel better, and it will allow you to see much more of what’s really there – especially if you’re looking for “proof” that an idea works. You'll be able to see – exactly what you needed to see, so that you can take the next step with much more confidence now. With that assurance (even with a little doubt left over), you’ll discover that it was the last step you took – that finally removed the shadow of lingering doubt. We might not feel this way completely, beforehand. But once we make a move, we are past where we were, and those doubts are far behind us now, too. When we've arrived – we can see with 100% clarity, just how important the last step and the destination really were to us...

We already know this, when we see others who desire to take a step forward, because we’re not wrapped up in those particular doubts. So, we can see quite clearly what will take them, from here – to there. And, it’s the same with us, too. So, take what you already know from past experiences with yourself and in seeing others grow, and remember…

Where we really want to be – is always worth more – than the doubts we have about it. That’s why we have those desires to begin with! A part of us already knows how good something can be, because the desire for it was born, before any doubts took their places...

To reconnect with that spark, do the math on paper to really see if it’s a good idea. And, if the math proves it, well…There’s your answer. Math is what we use to be as objective as we can, especially when our emotions are involved. Numbers we be exactly what they are, regardless of our hopes or doubts about it. And with those doubts removed, you can take your steps forward now with much more confidence. With that final boost of energy, movement and momentum, it won’t be very long till you’re standing right in the middle of the place you’ve been imagining…And that will always be: Good for you!

So, if it's what you really desire and the numbers are there to back it up, you can take a step ahead right now…

And, there you are.